• “You can’t break when you’re already broken”

    Date: 10.24.11 | by Judge Tom.

    Another teenager gave in to frustration, fear and loneliness by ending his life in October 2011.  Jamie Hubley of Ottawa, Canada, suffered years of bullying due to his perceived and then openly gay status. During his last month, Jamie posted regularly about his pain and struggles with depression.

    The title of this post was Jamie’s blog title and it contained the following statement: “I hate being the only gay guy in my school . . it —-ing sucks, I really want to end it.”

    Once again, as is common in these cases, Jamie’s friends weren’t aware of the real person under the mask. Steph Wheeler, 16, a close friend said “From the outside, he looked like the happiest kid. He was always smiling and giving everybody hugs in the halls. Even though he was feeling down all the time, he always made everybody else feel better.”

    Jamie Hubley

    Jamie was a gifted actor and singer. He looked forward to dance lessons this winter. Classmates at A.Y. Jackson Secondary School posted memories of Jamie on a memorial site. “You left a big footprint in everyone’s heart, and you will always be remembered” was one such message. A wristband is being created in Jamie’s honor. It will read “Acceptance” on the outside and “Rest in Peace Jamie Hubley” on the inside.

    On Jamie’s last day, October 14, 2011, he wrote “I’m tired of life really. Its so hard, I’m sorry. I can’t take it anymore. Being sad is sad. . .I’ve been like this for way to long.”

    We must work together to make the world a better place for everyone, adult and child alike. LGBT youth are particularly vulnerable to abuse – 90% report being victims of bullying at school. Think before you post an online message or send a cruel text. Think about the consequences to yourself, your family, the victim and victim’s family. Mean-spirited comments have backfired on many teens. Educational, civil and criminal sanctions have been the result of irresponsible emails, blogs, Facebook and YouTube posts. “Think B4 U Send.”

    For real-life cases of teenagers in trouble at school, home and with the law over their cyber-posts, take a look at “Teen Cyberbullying Investigated” (Free Spirit Publishing, 2010).   

    Judge Tom

    This post was written by Judge Tom. Judge Tom is the founder and moderator of AsktheJudge.info. He is a retired juvenile judge and spent 23 years on the bench. He has written several books for lawyers and judges as well as teens and parents including the recently published 'Teen Cyberbullying Investigated' (Free Spirit Publishing). When he's not answering teens' questions, Judge Tom can be found hiking, traveling and reading.

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    2 Comments subscribe to these comments.

    • Askthejudge.info
      Tue, 25 Oct 2011 at 12:44

      New blog post: "You can't break when you're already broken" – Another teenager gave in to frustration, fear and lone… http://t.co/XvqrBtfC

    • Tulsa Divorce Lawyers
      Wed, 26 Oct 2011 at 11:43

      My hope is that tragic stories like Jamie’s will jolt law makers into action – to pass laws that authorize harsher penalties for convicted bullies.
      A valid point, Matt, but regardless of whether additional state or federal laws are passed, the remedy to antisocial behavior rests in the home. Parents need to model appropriate ways to socialize and communicate with others. This should start in the pre-school years and be reinforced at school through antibullying programs.

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